….the summer heat has calmed, and the leaves are starting to change. The colorful, flashing view from the bus is getting me mentally geared up for coats, pumpkin EVERYTHING, apple picking (Ange?), and for a generally awesome, falltime visit to Maine!
Fall has always been strangely bittersweet to me…by far my favorite season, it gives me a really strange butterfly feeling in my stomach. Maybe it’s that odd back-to-school feeling, that has lingered since middle school and into my post-graduate years? For God’s sake. It’s my second fall with no more school in it. Shouldn’t that be over?!
Maybe it’s because fall evokes such a visible passage of time, it makes people reflect. I always feel like I don’t get to do enough with my summer. I think everyone sort of feels like that. Work, work, work. Pay bills. Pay rent. Pay loans. Pay for ticket home (gladly, of course, but still)! There’s a lot to think about. Summer regret is just a symptom of adulthood, perhaps.
But when I think about what I did this summer, it kind of surprises me…it’s one of those times when you look at your life, versus what the “2009/2010 you” thought your life would look like. Riding a fixed gear (!) to a shoot that is fun, but starting to feel like a true job (!), then rush downtown to work at American Apparel (!!! rahhhhhihatethem), and maybe hop over to the Thompson Hotel roof for an overpriced drink (!) with gorgeous model friends (!) was SO not where I saw myself in 2011. But I am so happy…! What I used to find scary, intimidating, or impossible, has become my life, and it’s refreshing to have changed.
So I didn’t go to Toronto Island more than once, or sit in the sun (not that I’m allowed to, but I fucking LOVE being all warm and sweaty!), or do karaoke (it was closed when we went!), or see LA, or Seattle to see the girls, or do a dance class, or bike out to Niagara Falls…there are so many little mundane things that make me feel so glad to be where I am.
This realization has been brought to you by Fall! Get your very own Fall today!
The only thing missing in Toronto Life 2011 is my family and friends from home. I want more visits to Toronto, and will try my hardest to get my ass out to see my friends from near and far! Aaaaaaaand, apologies for the rant. It’s a long bus trip, afterall! What’s a girl to do?! I know if you weren’t interested, you wouldn’t have gotten this far, so MUAH!